anxiety, authors, bipolar, books, kindle, Life, Los Angeles, migraines, new year, Uncategorized

As the Year Comes to a Close-2018

So many people ask around this time of year what your plans are for next year.  I look back on my year and all I can think is how I am in awe on what I accomplished in twelve months.  The past year was filled with so many unexpected things that all I can do is look forward to more new opportunities and life changes.  Do I know what’s in store for me?  Absolutely not!  At this time last year I had a completely different idea or well, plan for where my life was headed.

Last year, I saw the most growth in my life in years.  Big highlights that instantly come to mind are finally getting disability after four years of waiting for a hearing, and moving to Los Angeles.  I know when it’s read that it seems like two small things, but they were both catalysts to what would become of me.  Without the disability compensation I would have NEVER been able to buy the Mac that I’m typing on now, this website, a car or even to afford a move to start anew.  It gave me a direction that I did not know that my life would take.  If you would have told me even four months ago that I would drive cross country alone, and moving to a city that I only visited two weeks before I moved it would be followed by a chuckle.  I thought that most people, like my friends, would think that I was insane or being too impulsive.  Surprisingly, I had overwhelming support not just from them, but from doctors that had treated me for years for my chronic illnesses.

Do I think that I made a bad decision?  Nope.  After a month and a half of being in LA I  met friends, and have an active social life.  I didn’t have that, or really the opportunity to living in Charlotte.  When I left I had one friend in town that I only saw every couple months.  Most of my friends left me by the side whether it was because I had months where I couldn’t drive or meet them out.  A lot of friends in town got married and had kids, and I didn’t.  That changes many relationships in the Southeast.  It is completely abnormal to be thirty-eight years old and not have those things.  When you can’t do play dates, you spend most of your time alone.  I honestly did not think that I would meet friends through my holiday job when I first started, but I did.  Overall, my quality of life improved immensely!

I would never change anything about my life.  For years I thought about multiple “what if” situations.  In the end, after learning massive amounts of patience, that I would not be here without all of the crazy experiences that I can tell and advise others about what not to do.  Without the letdowns I wouldn’t appreciate where I am both emotionally, and physically.  I had to reach the bottom for me to get to where I am.  I was always headstrong, but I learned so much that I was capable of doing with, and most importantly in my life.  Bottom line… I am living my best life.

So, 2019… let’s do this!